True but thats because hes a fetus.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I need a beard to bite.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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