do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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