I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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