Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
someone owes me an orgasm
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
