mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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