Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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