He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
