The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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