Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize