peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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