its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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