Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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