the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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