oh god the rape fog is back!
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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