Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I can't turn off my feet"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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