Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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