Duck Duck Cougar?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
