her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
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