Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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