I must be too annoying 4 u.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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