I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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