Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
