Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
