OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
