Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Booty call?

  (310): View more from California

  Dude you don't even follow my twitter

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  (323): Booty call? (310): Dude you don't even follow my twitter http://tfl.nu/5q8u
  Replies (15) Good night (659) Bad night (2654)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent

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  (281): I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent http://tfl.nu/311d
  Replies (37) Good night (3198) Bad night (1054)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket

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  (321): you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket http://tfl.nu/cdhn
  Replies (39) Good night (2877) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me

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  (415): Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me http://tfl.nu/bq34
  Replies (20) Good night (1216) Bad night (4516)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.

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  (917): half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country. http://tfl.nu/tafy
  Replies (262) Good night (20586) Bad night (2118)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.

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  (702): i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again. http://tfl.nu/kiui
  Replies (23) Good night (5906) Bad night (1217)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!

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  (440): We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis! http://tfl.nu/tuy6
  Replies (119) Good night (1771) Bad night (9756)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.

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  (248): just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night. http://tfl.nu/esr4
  Replies (6) Good night (948) Bad night (3258)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.

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  (904): You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award. http://tfl.nu/86ud
  Replies (3) Good night (1305) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass

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  (302): His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass http://tfl.nu/wy91
  Replies (5) Good night (1433) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn

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  (585): There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn http://tfl.nu/f3ez
  Replies (6) Good night (1154) Bad night (450)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.

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  (410): Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week. http://tfl.nu/e9o5
  Replies (1) Good night (904) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever

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  (+44): I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever http://tfl.nu/y8hk
  Replies (29) Good night (2664) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo

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  (937): On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo http://tfl.nu/dcwu
  Replies (2) Good night (327) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am

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  (404): A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am http://tfl.nu/md1x
  Replies (0) Good night (678) Bad night (213)

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