Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
