who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
