just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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