Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Randomize
