Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
