So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
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