You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
