Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
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