There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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