btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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