I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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