if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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