big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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