her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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