i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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