I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I got inside last night via doggy door
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
