drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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