it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize