is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
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i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
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Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED