We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster