i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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