the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
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He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
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Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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