hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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