Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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