I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
