Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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