That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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